1984 wallabies tour

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As a young boy in 1984, I was heavily influenced by sport (as I am now). I was interested in most sports, especially sporting events on these shores. In football, I had Liverpool, a dominant force for the majority of the 1980s. In athletics, I loved the rivalry of middle-distance runners, Steve Ovett and Sebastian Coe, not too mention a pretender to the throne, Steve Cram. In rugby, I had started to go with family members to watch Cardiff RFC and was soon pretending to be Mark Ring, Gareth Davies or Terry Holmes in my back garden. At this point in rugby, I had not yet been influenced heavily by overseas teams, this was all about to change, Australia was soon to turn my young head, and new heroes were on the horizon. Before 1984, Australia had had some success on the rugby field in patches, but as of yet had not reached the heights of their Antipodean rivals, New Zealand. In 1983, an Australian side led by Bob Dwyer had lost a two-test series in France. Alan Jones, a relatively unknown coach to many outside of Australia, expressed his desire to become coach of the national side. Jones, had been a very successful coach at schoolboy level, but at senior level, had only achieved a success that year, when he coached Manly to the Sydney First Grade Premiership, beating a regular and robust powerhouse in Australian domestic rugby, Randwick, where current Australian captain Mark Ella played.

Alan Jones set about trying to gain support to be the coach, and with Dwyer's poor winning record as coach, he achieved many supporters. In February 1984, Jones was installed as national coach of Australia, and immediately set a target to become the best international side in world rugby. In mid-1984, Australia toured New Zealand in a three-match test series, losing the series and The Bledisloe Cup 1-2. Jones and his coaching staff turned their attention to the upcoming Britain and Ireland tour and set the marker of beating all the national sides during the trip. To achieve a Grand Slam. Before the tour, Jones took the step of removing the captaincy from outside half, Mark Ella and gave the role to Manly centre, Andrew Slack. Jones also made vice-captain for the tour, Manly lock forward Steve Williams. Jones had put players around him in leadership roles, who he trusted and had done well for him at a domestic level. With his coaches, Jones brought in Queenslander, Alec Evans, a coach widely respected in Australia, and renowned as a forward coach as his assistant coach. Evans would go onto coach Cardiff and Wales many years later, and would many times be a coach that Australia would turn to for advice, a fantastic coach. Jones also made Charles Wilson, a former Wallaby captain, team manager. Both recruits played a considerable part in the success of the national side and were inspired choices. The 1984 tour lasted over two months and took in 18 matches in total, with four tests within that itinerary. The first match was against London Division; a team made up of London-based clubs. The game was played at Twickenham. Australia coming out on top, 22-3. Five more matches followed before the first test match against the first Home Nations country, England. In those matches, Australia drew with South and South West Division, lost to my beloved, Cardiff and won the others. The next test would be England. On the 3rd November 1984, Australia faced England; the English side had some excellent players in their ranks such as Nigel Melville, debutant outside half, Stuart Barnes and Rory Underwood. At half-time, Australia was leading three points to nil, courtesy of a Michael Lynagh penalty. Lynagh played at inside-centre on this tour, not the position he became more renowned for, outside half, that shirt was worn by Mark Ella, a magician of a player in the number ten shirt, and the first try of the game came from his genius. Ella received a pass from young scrum-half and future great, Nick Farr-Jones from the base of a scrum. Ella ran across the pitch with the English defence transfixed by decoy runs from fullback Roger Gould and winger David Campese. Ella spotted a tiny gap and jinked through it, scoring under the posts. Michael Lynagh scored two further tries, but the fourth and final try was the pick of them all. Farr-Jones passing the ball to Gould who threw a long pass out to Ella who collected the pass low down, Ella found Campese who outpaced Rory Underwood. Campese was looking for support inside as the English cover defence came across. Just as he was about to be bundled into touch, Campese lofted a pass back inside to the ever supporting flanker, Simon Poidevin who dived in to score a fantastic team effort. Final score, England 3 Australia 19.

One week later, Ireland hosted Australia at Lansdowne Road. Australia led at half-time 0-6, courtesy of two drop goals, one from Lynagh and one from Ella. In the second half, three penalties from Irish kicker, centre Michael Kiernan put Ireland in front with only 17 minutes left to play. However, Ella managed another drop goal to have the game tied. Campese then received the ball, and with Ireland short of defenders, the ball got passed back inside to Ella who was able to get in for the try. A late penalty completed the win by Lynagh. Final score Ireland 9 Australia 16. Two test victories out of two, the Grand Slam was very much on.

The next international would be at Cardiff Arms Park, where Wales entertained Australia. It was a rainy day, and the pitch was muddy and heavy, not ideal for the brand of rugby that Australia was playing. However, the forwards for Australia were to show their metal. The pack made up of Topo Rodriguez, Tom Lawton, Andy McIntyre, Steve Williams, Steve Cutler, Simon Poidevin, Steve Tunyman and David Codey, dominated the Welsh pack. The first try was from a line out won by Cutler, a maul was set up, and Farr-Jones made a break down the blindside, his pass released Peter Grigg, and the bearded wing powerhouse, after a break passed inside to hooker, Lawton who plunged over the line. The second try, was again courtesy of a break by Farr-Jones, who passed onto Campese, the dazzling, sidestepping winger made many opposing players miss before passing onto Poidevin, who moved the ball onto Lynagh to score the try. The third try was courtesy of a 5-metre scrum, where the Australian eight, shoved their Welsh counterparts over the line, where number 8, Tunyman touched down for the score. Wales were next to score through scrum-half David Bishop; the only try Australia were to concede in test matches on tour, however, regular service was to be resumed when Ella intercepted a pass to touch down. Ella had now scored a try in each of the internationals on tour. Final score, Wales 9 Australia 28.

The Grand Slam decider was played at Murrayfield against Scotland. Fifteen minutes into the game, Ella threw a brilliant cut out pass which led to Campese scoring the first try. In the second half, Ella would complete his remarkable achievement of scoring a try in each of the internationals on tour. Ella did a run around with Gould which opened up the Scottish midfield for him to score. With fifteen minutes left, Farr-Jones would complete the try-scoring, by darting down the touchline following a planned two-man line out move where the scrum-half capitalised diving in at the corner. All Scotland had in response was four penalties from fullback, Peter Dods. Final score, Scotland 12 Australia 37. The Grand Slam was achieved, mission accomplished.

In a total of the 18 matches played on the tour, Australia won 13, drew 1 and lost 4. The Wallabies achieved the target of winning all the internationals, however winning is one thing, it is the manner that they won. Some of their play was stunning. The back moves they instigated, the speed of pass, elusive running, decoy runners fixing defenders was an absolute joy to watch. But they also could mix it up as they proved against Wales in poor conditions, when their forwards showed total domination up front, driving the ball on and playing to a more conservative approach. Players such as Campese, Slack, Lynagh, Ella, Farr-Jones, Rodriguez, Lawton, Williams, Cutler and Poidevin were indeed a match for anyone in their respective positions in the world. They had squad players of the ability of centre, Michael Hawker, wingers Brendan Moon and Matthew Burke and back-row forward, Bill Calcraft, hardly got a look in for the international games, just emphasising just how good this group of players were.

As a youngster I was star struck, this was the first international overseas rugby union team that I fell in love with. The style of play was a joy to behold, if you have never seen them, please check out the video clips on YouTube. You will not be disappointed. Mark Ella and the autumn of 1984 I will remember for many many years to come. The all-conquering 1984 Wallabies side, I thank you.

About the Author - Craig Muncey is a writer from Cardiff, Wales and co-author of Matthew Rees autobiography, "Reasons 2 Smile" . His second book, 'Steve Fenwick: Dragon's and Lions' will shortly be available with St. David's Press. You can follow Craig on twitter @CraigMuncey

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The legendary Wallabies of 1984

ALAN Jones wears a black beanie low, almost over the eyes. But will his disguise work? Certainly the Wallabies coach hopes so as, standing inside an empty Murrayfield Stadium in Scotland, hands wedged deep inside a plain tracksuit top.

ALAN Jones wears a black beanie low, almost over the eyes. But will his disguise work?

Certainly the Wallabies coach hopes so as, standing inside an empty Murrayfield Stadium in Scotland, hands wedged deep inside a plain tracksuit top, he glances about for someone, anyone, to discuss what bothers him — wind.

Specifically, this breeze which has blown ferociously since he first emerged this morning from his Edinburgh hotel. A breeze he just knows Scotland will be wanting to use against his Australians when they meet here later that afternoon.

And so Jones scans the stadium until, eventually, his eyes settle on a groundsman pottering about in a corner.

Then, pulling that beanie low, the Aussie coach approaches and extends his hand -- mumbling something about being a rugby nut who, with no Test ticket, just wanted to see, first hand, this greatest of playing arenas.

And for the ensuing 10 minutes, our tourist continues praising every aspect of Murrayfield until, as if on a whim, he brings up that howling breeze.

To which the Scotsman, now high on praise, happily explains wind directions, strengths, the ways to use it and, oh, would you believe bang on half-time it drops completely?

“All of which I passed on to our captain Andrew Slack, waiting in a cab outside,’’ Jones laughs now, 30 years on. “That afternoon we won the toss, ran with the breeze and led 18-3 at the break ... which is exactly when the wind dropped.”

If ever Australia was given the chance to preserve only one sporting memory — a single team sealed in bubble wrap so future generations might know how we once got things done — who would argue against the Wallaby Grand Slammers of 1984?

More than simply beating the might of England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales, this is a tale equal parts innovation and perspiration. Grace, growth, grit. A tour starting out with a mob of amateurs ... and finishing with immortals.

Men like Mark Ella, Michael Lynagh and Nick Farr-Jones. Simon Poidevin and David Campese.

“Footballers,’’ as Jones recalls it, “who played for the sake of the game”.

Yep, here was a team whose forwards practised on the first scrum machine, packing it down after every session and hauling it onto the team bus. Our backs too, honing skills on the gloriously titled “No Shit Passes” drill — which had players throw exactly that, the theory being a bad pass would never be an excuse for not catching it.

Under Jones, nothing was left to chance. His methods so intense that, in the weeks before setting out, he had everyone gather daily at St Johns College chapel where they practiced singing ‘Advance Australia Fair’.

“Not that I thought of us as innovators,’’ Jones insists. “Growing up, I was taught not to accept mediocrity and being a great rugby side, even back then ... it wasn’t one job, it was three.”

Which wasn’t always an easy sell, right?

“There was some whinging about the demands I placed on them,’’ Jones smiles. “But I asked plenty of those players and, every time, they responded.

“And, yes, I know it helped that we were winning. Had we been losing they probably would’ve thought I was an arrogant, dogmatic prick.”

Yet like his players, the coach never stopped either.

Like on their first night in each town, when Jones would hand his assistant coach Alec Evans, the first ever in rugby, a pile of coins and directions to the nearest pub. His task: buy pint after pint for the local rugby nuts until, just like that Murrayfield groundsman, they give up everything they know about our next opponent.

This, see, was the Wallabies of ’84.

Innovative and disciplined. Determined and skilled. And, oh, how they ran the footy.

“Because whether with language or a football,’’ smiles Jones, “you attack. We were dedicated to playing a style people remembered. That made them say ‘Oh, my God, did you just see that?’.

“And 30 years on people are still talking about us ... so we must’ve done something right.”

Indeed, at a gala lunch in Sydney on November 14, our Wallaby Grand Slammers are uniting again.

Reviving stories about Chris Roche, the breakaway, breaking an antique table in Buckingham Palace. Or Mark Ella’s unforgettable try against Scotland.

Even Jones, before the tour had started, following fullback Roger Gould all the way to Argentina, where he had disappeared with his girlfriend, and convincing him to play.

And as for those infamous singing sessions?

“Oh, of course we did them,’’ Jones laughs. “I wasn’t going to the other side of the world with a group of footballers who, when Advance Australia Fair played, would stand mute.

“So we knew it and we were proud of it. Singing that anthem, it affirmed who we were.”

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Team Sport Australia Award | 2002

Rugby Union

The first Australian team to win the Grand Slam. The team scored 100 points in the four tests, being the highest number of points scored by any team touring the UK and Ireland. The 12 tries scored in the 4 Tests were the most scored by any touring team in Tests.

The third Test win on tour, against Wales, was the first time an Australian team had won three Tests in succession on a tour of the UK and Ireland.

Mark Ella , scored a try in each of the four Tests, a feat never before achieved by a player in a touring team. Michael Lynagh scored 42 points in the four Test series, more points than any other Australian in a Test series.

Competition Tour to UK

Coach A Jones A Evans (Assistant Coach)

Captain A G Slack

Team Members:  J W Black, M P Burke, G H Burrow (Reserve), W J Calcraft, W A Campbell,  D I Campese , D Codey, P A Cox, S A G Cutler, M G Ella,  N C Farr-Jones , P C Grigg, R G Gould, R G Hanley, M J Hawker, N C Holt, T A Lane, T A Lawton, C P Lillicrap,  M P Lynagh , M I McBain, A J McIntyre, B J Moon, S Pilecki,  S P Poidevin , R J Reynolds, C Roche, E E Rodriguex, S N Tuynman, I M Williams (Reserve), S A Williams

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The 1984 wallabies, my favourite all-time team.

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In my opinion the best ever team to be put on the field in Australian rugby history was the side selected to play England on the Grand Slam tour.

15. Roger Gould What can I say. One morning I will wake up and say Matt Burke was the best ever fullback, the next morning I’ll say Gould. And so on. Big man, big skills, big talent.

14. David Campese Mercurial winger, famed for the ‘goosestep’ sidestep. Excitement machine. Really needs no introduction.

13. Andy Slack Captain of the team and much better than people think. Underplayed his hand, but had wonderful all round skills.

12. Mike Lynagh Only his second Test at this time. Went onto glittering career as playmaker and goalkicker. In top three or four flyhalfs.

11. Brendan Moon Broke his arm in this Test and out for rest of tour. One of the best four or five wingers to represent Australia.

10. Mark Ella If you had to pick one guy to show how rugby could be played to its maximum potential, Ella would be your man. Scored a try in each of the four internationals.

9. Nick Farr-Jones On debut in this match. Went on to become one of our best ever scrumhalfs.

8. Steve Tuynman Just his third Test. A schoolboy sensation who went onto excellent senior career. Had all the skills, but perhaps lacked some mongrel.

7. Simon Poidevin Yet another legend. Outstanding flanker who could play both sides of scrum. Heart of the team with his committed, never say die attitude.

6. David Codey Second Test. Aggressive tight-loose backrower who gave the Wallabies extra choice of options in lineout as well as in general play.

5. Steve Cutler Born for the moment when “giraffes” were required because of the ‘no lifting’ edict. Supreme lineout jumper, but he was much more than a one-trick pony.

4. Steve Williams Hard working, 80 minutes playing lock who complemented Cutler, and was the forward leader.

3. Andy McIntyre One of our best ever tight heads. Went about his business without fuss and held his own in the bowels of the scrum.

2. Tom Lawton In his early days had it all: size, strength, skills, mobility, technique, nous. Lawton, Kearns, Lawton, Kearns. Not much in it.

1. Topo Rodriguez “Cometh the hour, cometh the man”. What he did to lift Aussie forward play goes beyond the playing pitch. Would have to be one of the greatest sporting emigrants to our country.

Bench 22. Peter Grigg Pips the other Matt Burke (b.1964) for the outside back position. Whole hearted winger.

21. Mike Hawker Says something about the depth of the Aussie backline that he couldn’t make the starting seven. Wonderful all round skills, gutsy and clever player.

20. Phil Cox Played the domestic Tests against the All Blacks before being bumped. Ella said he felt most comfortable playing with Cox.

19. Chris Roche Awesome fetcher and scavenger. But lack of size and height was his downfall. Totally committed team player.

18. Ross Reynolds Like Tuynman, had the full package of height, size, skills and mobility, but probably lacked sufficient mongrel.

17. Cameron Lillicrap Only 21 at the time, but considered an awesome loosehead prop prospect. Unfortunately, untimely injuries stunted his career.

16. Mark McBain Unfortunately, like Roche, it was a case of the good little man losing out to the good big man. In his case, Lawton.

In a perfect world, it would have been great to consider the following, who were all capable by age and ability to be part of this grand adventure and the 22 man squad.

Mick O’Connor Centre/Wing. Australian Rugby really missed his breathtaking play, but he had defected to league. I would have played him at 13, moving Slack to 12, and Lynagh to the bench. Could also kick goals.

Mark Loane Eightman. Dr Loane, who would have just turned 30 in 1984, often told Alan Jones he retired too early. Although a folk hero in Queensland as captain of the State team, I would have retained Slack as skipper.

David Hillhouse Lock. Gave up a lot of Test rugby to train as a commercial jet pilot. Had freakish jumping skills, outreaching taller opponents and had a marvellous all round game.

Tony D’Arcy Prop. His decision to defect to league was ill-advised, as he was totally unsuited to the game. Like Topo, could play both sides of scrum, and was a brute of a man, naturally strong. Had he still been around in 1984, would he have kept Topo out?

The result of the Grand Slam internationals was as follows: England, won 19-3; Ireland, won 16-9; Wales, won 28-9; Scotland, won 37-12; (Barbarians, won 37-30).

Those were the days!

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About: 1984 Australia rugby union tour of Britain and Ireland

The 1984 Australia rugby union tour of Britain and Ireland was a series of eighteen matches played by the Australia national rugby union team (the Wallabies) in Britain and Ireland between 17 October and 15 December 1984. The Australian team won thirteen matches, drew one and lost four but notably won all four of their international matches.

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Australia’s 1984 Grand Slam-winning Wallabies celebrate their achievement 30 years on

THE 1984 Grand Slam Wallabies met in Sydney on Friday to celebrate the 30th anniversary of their historic achievement.

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THEY are our most celebrated Wallabies, up there with the 1991 and 1999 World champion teams.

Coach Alan Jones and his 1984 Grand Slam outfit gathered at the Westin Hotel in Sydney on Friday to celebrate 30 years since they defeated England, Ireland, Wales and Scotland on their all-conquering tour of the Home Nations.

It’s something no Wallabies team had done before or since.

The tales grow greater with the each re-telling and it was a special day for a group of men who share the bonds of history.

Mark Ella attended the lunch but missed this photo shot.

The only absentee was centre Michael Hawker, who is overseas. But he is in the hearts of a team that is a true icon of Australian sport.

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Big bother: How 1984 Wallabies shook the world

• Huw Richards Close • FT's rugby writer from 1995 to 2009 • Also writes for the International Herald Tribune and the Sunday Herald

Alan Jones called it the Gucci principle: "Long after you've forgotten the cost, you remember the quality". And 30 years on from when his 1984 Wallabies were laying waste to British rugby, the quality of that team remains a vivid memory.

Theirs was among the last of the old-style tours - not quite the 30-odd match marathons of earlier years, but still with 15 other matches alongside the four internationals, ensuring that the tourists were seen outside the major centres.

Not a huge amount was expected of them. Australia still had a losing record against all of the home nations, except England. It was known that they had run the All Blacks close in that year's Bledisloe series and some particularly assiduous British observers remembered the brilliance of a schools team which had visited in 1978 and wondered when their style would seep through at top level.

But this was still a world in which southern hemisphere teams might arrive as comparative unknowns. This one kicked off against London Counties at Twickenham on a midweek October afternoon. There was a decent crowd, but still a lot of space in the creaking old stands and terraces.

They won 22-3, with newcomer Nick Farr-Jones making a decent impression at scrum-half and London wing Simon Smith noticing the frequency with which he was confronted by two or three Wallabies, even though none of the men inside him had done anything wrong.

It was the first warning of the quality veteran Daily Telegraph writer John Mason would note at the end of the tour: "The speed of the correctly-timed pass will beat the man every time and support will create space every time."

And it was impossible not to notice coach Jones, by some margin the most quotable figure yet seen in a rugby press conference. He was not to all tastes - predecessor Bob Dwyer complained that he had been deposed amid "squalid intrigue" by a man who knew plenty about hardball politics from his time as a speechwriter for prime minister Malcolm Fraser. But by turns witty, incisive and bombastic, he was never dull.

But whether his team would be more succesful than any of its predecessors - the 1981 team had won only one international out of four, in spite of scoring more tries than their opponent in each match - was in doubt after the London victory was followed by a 12-12 draw with South and South West and a 16-12 loss at Cardiff.

That was the first of four defeats in non-international matches - they would also lose to Llanelli, Ulster and South of Scotland. Like most of its predecessors, this Wallaby squad lacked depth.

But the first XV was a different matter, with strength at every point. Their scrummaging had been greatly strengthened by the recruitment of Puma prop Topo Rodriguez, who still felt Argentinian enough to be an extremely reluctant participant in the team's audience with the Queen at Buckingham Palace, only two and half years on from the Falklands War.

Tom Lawton, whose grandfather had been one of the Australian giants of the 1920s, proved two decades before Steve Thompson that it was possible to weigh 260lb and still have the all-round skills needed by a top-class hooker. Steve Cutler dominated the line-out and Simon Poidevin brought real quality to the back row.

That pack provided an immensely solid platform for a back division incorporating the rookie Farr-Jones, rising midfielder Michael Lynagh in a centre partnership with understated but authoritative captain Andrew Slack, wing David Campese and Roger Gould, a truly world-class full-back.

Yet even this assemblage of talent was outshone by outside-half Mark Ella, a member of the 1978 Schools team. One of 12 children in an Aboriginal family from the tough Sydney suburb of La Perouse, he struck the perceptive Dwyer as completely subverting the stereotype of native players as brilliant but unsophisticated. Even at 19, Dwyer recalled, "He spoke with precision about how he played the position…this was a skilled operator talking, not some free-spirited person."

Australian journalist Evan Whitton credited him with "the timing of Bon Hope, the subtlety of [mime artist] Jean-Louis Barrault and a feeling for angles unrivalled for Euclid". Standing closer to opponents than most outside-halves, he sucked in defenders while leaving them wondering which of his supporting runners would get the ball, then ran superb supporting angles himself.

"There was barely a moment in the whole Test series when the Wallabies were in trouble"

They kicked off at Twickenham against an England team whose five new caps included two long-awaited debuts - the half-back pairing of Bath outside-half Stuart Barnes, delayed by his brave and principled decision not to tour apartheid-era South Africa the summer before, and Wasp Nigel Melville, victim of a series of injuries. Melville was made captain as well.

England did not play badly, but the only one of them to seriously inconvenience the tourists was debutant prop Gareth Chilcott who poleaxed Farr-Jones with a blow to the jaw and was fortunate not to be sent off. Lynagh had an off day with the boot, but the Wallabies still won 19-3 with tries from Ella - exchanging passes with Lynagh, drifting across field and allowing England to be distracted by his support runners before slicing through a tiny gap to score.

Typically of English rugby at this time, none of the five debutants featured in their next match, against Romania in January.

That performance created the template for the tour. Australia's forwards would exert control, Ella would score and the Wallabies would win with something to spare. As Rothman's Rugby Yearbook would note: "There was barely a moment in the whole Test series when the Wallabies were in trouble."

Ireland, who gave debuts to four future captains - Brendan Mullin, Phil Matthews, Willie Anderson and Michael Bradley - came closest, leading well into the final quarter before the Wallabies took control to win 16-9 with Ella adding two drop goals to his try.

The victory over Wales is remembered as the only international appearance by Pontypool scrum-half David Bishop, the Randall McMurphy of Welsh rugby. Bishop both showed why he was regarded by so many as a potentially great player with a superb solo try, the only time the tourists' line was crossed in four tests, and Wales generally chose to do without him as he failed to provide a decent service to his backs, instead running regularly into the waiting arms of the Australian back-row.

Australia won 28-9, a victory which for them was highlighted by a pushover score, with the Wales scrum splintering under pressure and flanker Alun Davies, like Bishop playing his only test, detaching himself as the Wallabies rumbled unstoppably towards the line.

The last Test was expected to be the toughest, against a Scottish team who earlier in the year had won their first Grand Slam in 59 years and fielded a debutant flanker named John Jeffrey. Instead it was a four-try, 37-12 hammering with Farr-Jones claiming his first Test score, Campese crossing twice and Ella completing a personal Grand Slam as memorable as his team's.

Among their predecessors only the 1947-8 Wallabies had won even three internationals. And nobody from any country had achieved Ella's feat.

Rothman's cautioned against automatically regarding the tourists as a great team, arguing that none of the home nations was in a great state. And when Ella quit top-class rugby the following March, saying "I want to get out when I'm young enough to work on other things" and citing a cool relationship with Jones, it seemed possible Australian success might be short-lived.

With 30 years of hindsight, the achievement of the 1984 team can be seen as a vital rite of passage in the rise of Australian rugby from also-ran to world power. Australia since then have had a winning record against every opponent other than New Zealand. The Bledisloe Cup was recaptured after a 39-year wait in 1986, and four of the 1984 team - Farr-Jones (by now captain), Lynagh, Campese and Poidevin - were at the heart of the 1991 World Cup victory.

Thanks to George Orwell, 1984 will always convey a sense of foreboding for most of us. Australian rugby fans are among the happy minority for whom it has other, much more cheerful, associations.

10 Funniest Far Side Comics That Just Turned 40 (Including 1 of Gary Larson's All-Time Top 10)

• We've collected the best of the best from The Far Side 's May 1984 comics.
• Don't forget to vote in our end-of-article poll for your number 1 strip.
• Larson's May 1984 comics include iconic recurring themes like talking dogs, cynical chickens and inventive cavemen.

Gary Larson's The Far Side is one of the most iconic comic strips of all time, beloved by fans decades after it was originally published. Launched in 1980, The Far Side is famous for its love of nature , surreal sense of humor, and morbid obsession with human mortality. Those themes - as well as Larson's love of cavemen, chickens and talking dogs - can be found in these hilarious comics that just turned 40 years old.

Published in May 1984, each of these strips just hit the big 4-0. This list collects the ten best strips from the month, putting them in the context of Larson's past and future strips, as well as The Far Side creator's biggest obsessions and best jokes across the franchise's history. With Larson producing 7 strips a week at the time, there's plenty to choose from in picking the best of the best. Don't forget to vote for your favorite comic in our end-of-article poll , and have your say on which strip deserves the number 1 spot.

The Outdoors - Published May 3, 1984

Gary larson's conservationist streak inspired multiple comics.

Gary Larson rarely gets political in the pages of The Far Side , and it's even uncommon for his strips to have any kind of 'message.' However, one idea that Larson returns to again and again is the need for conservation, and the senseless ways in which humans thoughtlessly harm the world they live in. In an interview with 20/20 in 1986, Larson was asked if he had more respect for animals than for humans, jokingly replying that would be an accurate assumption, and commenting, "I've never met an Irish Setter I didn't like." Throughout his professional life, Larson has put his money where his mouth is, fundraising for various conversationist charities over his career.

That perspective comes through in this stirp, which sees two loggers taking a break, as one expresses his love of working in the great outdoors - blithely unaware that he spends all day destroying the natural world that apparently calls to him so much. Plenty of Larson's comics see animals getting some kind of twisted vengeance on humans who trespass in their domains - whether it's sharks tricking beach-goers into the water or bears puppeteering the skulls of unlucky campiers - hower this strip is a little more bleak and, in 2024, as pointed as ever.

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Lemmings - Published May 11, 1984

The far side pokes fun at a common misconception.

In this comic, Larson depicts a group of lemmings running off a cliff. However, rather than falling to its doom, one of the rodents is enjoying the opportunity to make a splash. The Far Side has a bunch of lemming comics with the same basic theme, tapping into one of the most widely believed 'nature facts' that's not even close to true.

For fans of The Far Side , it's perhaps odd that Larson doesn't have even more comics about lemmings. Larson loves the natural world and slightly morbid jokes, while his strips tend to thrive when they can play off a pre-existing understanding or narrative, subverting it in unique ways. Given lemmings offer all three packaged into one furry creature, they might have been a more appropriate mascot for the series than Larson's beloved cows .

The misconception that lemmings will stampede off cliffs to their doom is generally attributed to Disney's documentary White Wilderness , which showed the rodents doing exactly that. However, it was later discovered that the scenes had been faked, with the film crew not just forcing the lemmings off the cliff, but even bringing the animals with them, since they weren't native to the Alberta locale chosen for filming. It's a grim backstory that nature-lover Larson surely knew and couldn't help mocking time and time again.

Kangaroos vs Wallabies - Published May 15, 1984

Gary larson imagines a bizarre link between kangaroos & crime.

Thankfully, this goofy comic doesn't have any hidden darkness, but it does once again celebrate Larson's love of nature. The gag hinges on the similarity between kangaroos and wallabies - similar-looking marsupials that differ mostly in size. Larson finds a practical context for that misunderstanding, turning the situation into a police line-up where a ruffled witness struggles to identify the right marsupial. It's a perfect example of what makes Larson such a great joke writer, instinctively sensing the point of connection between two very disparate ideas. This is a quality that Stephen King praised in his foreword to The Far Side Gallery 2 , writing, "he sees what I could see if I could have his eyes."

Less explicable are Larson's other comics where kangaroos are linked to criminal behavior. In those cases, fans are forced to assume that Gary Larson simply has some kind of grudge against marsupials .

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The Far Side's Gary Larson worried that he was "bucking for a lightning bolt" when it came to these 10 Far Side comics starring the Almighty..

Talking Dog - Published May 14, 1984

Gary larson loves a talking dog.

While Larson is capable of laugh-out-loud gags, he also often creates comics that get funnier and funnier the more you think about them. In this case, a talking dog appears on TV, where the producers have set up cue cards to dictate its response to their questions. The notion of a TV show stumbling across a real talking dog but still feeling the need to fake such a minor aspect of their coverage is perfectly surreal. Of course, Buffy is far from the only talking dog in The Far Side 's long history .

Scribbled - Published May 4, 1984

Larson's stick figure comics are some of his best.

While Gary Larson's art style is minimalistic, longtime Far Side fans know it's also instantly recognizable. Even Larson made a joke out of his tendency to draw the same basic figures again and again, with one strip revealing The Far Side 's cast - a troupe of fictional actors who 'play' Larson's characters, explaining why (for example) all his scientists tend to look the same.

Larson's stick figure comics are therefore a refreshing change, taking a totally different approach to depicting the average person. Of course, Larson being Larson, The Far Side 's stick figures only appear when he has a joke that depends on their simplified appearance - the earliest of which is from when Larson was only seven years old.

A lot of The Far Side 's best gags break the fourth wall in this way, often messing with the 'rules' of comic art to tell a unique joke. In this case, a comic character finds themselves suffering from a unique malady brought about by their artist scrawling them in a hurry.

This Far Side Comic Was a Direct Insult to Gary Larson's Editor

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Early Vegetarians - Published May 8, 1984

It wouldn't be the far side without cavemen.

Next to cows, The Far Side 's most famous recurring characters are its cavepeople , with Larson often using the characters to present the discovery of some modern concept, usually simplified down to a ludicrous extent - for example cavemen inventing checkers on a board with only two squares. In this case, however, Larson goes for pure surrealism, as early vegetarians triumphantly carry a mammoth-sized carrot back from the 'hunt.' While Larson's art style may be minimalistic, he never misses the chance to improve on a gag, giving each of the 'hunters' a shovel in place of a spear.

Your Cat's Gonna Be Fine - Published May 24, 2024

Far side loves the classic dog vs cat cartoon clich.

Dog vs cat is a classic cliché of comic humor, and Larson's never been above depicting this elemental struggle. As stated earlier, one of Larson's greatest strengths as a joke-teller is tapping into existing narratives with clear rules, then subverting them. The animosity between dogs and cats is the perfect example - Larson uses a premise that all fans immediately understand but then adds a surreal twist. As usual, the dog wants to get at the cat, but in the world of The Far Side , it does so using a complex human disguise to fool the emergency services.

Larson's appreciation of nature means that his depictions of animal rivalries are often a little more 'red in tooth and claw' than other comics, and his most controversial strips have been accused of finding humor in animal cruelty . Perhaps the most controversial of all is Larson's infamous 'Tethercat' comic , for which the strip above could actually be read as a prequel.

The Far Side's First 10 Comics Are Still Hilarious Today

The Far Side's first ever comics introduce some of Gary Larson's most enduring themes, including strips which are just as funny over 40 years later.

Humpty Dumpty - Published May 31, 1984

If humpty dumpty didn't exist, gary larson would have had to create him.

Nursery rhymes are another example of a narrative with established characters and rules that Larson can subvert. In this case, Humpty Dumpty survives his fall from the wall, only for the structure to begin a lethal descent while he celebrates. Larson has several comics exploring Dumpty's fate, always pulling on a different thread of the popular rhyme - for example, if Humpty Dumpty is an egg, what's growing inside? And how might the remains of a giant egg be put to good use once the King's horsemen have failed to resurrect it?

Let Me Drive! - Published May 22, 2024

Far side characters know they're in real trouble once they get a name.

While Larson uses surrealism, darkness and the subversion of popular narratives in his comics, sometimes a goofy visual is all it takes to earn a big laugh. In this strip, a couple get so lost while driving that they find themselves on the moon, looking up to discover the Earth itself has become a distant landmark. As ever, Larson's gags get even funnier when you try to imagine the moments directly before or after they happened - while it's fair that Elroy's wife is demanding to drive given the mess he's gotten them into, why didn't she feel compelled to get involved a little earlier, for instance when the planet began to recede into the distance?

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Chicken Soup - Published May 18, 1984

One of far side's most popular comics just turned 40.

Our pick for the funniest Far Side comic published in May 1984 is this iconic strip where a sick chicken is given some nourishing chicken soup to drink, reassured with the dark promise that, "it's nobody we know." Chickens appear throughout The Far Side , with Larson finding humor in both their limited lifespans and the sheer weirdness of dropping them into unexpected situations. Larson's gags don't extend much sympathy to poultry, but they do acknowledge that - perhaps like humans - they don't get much choice in the cards they're dealt, so they may as well make the best of it .

Those were Screen Rant's picks for the funniest Far Side comics published in May 1984 - be sure to vote below for which of Gary Larson's comics you think have best stood up to the test of time over the last four decades .

The Far Side

Summary: Written and drawn by Gary Larson, The Far Side is a comic strip series that ran from December 1979 to January 1995. A worldwide hit, The Far Side explores life's surreal side and uses a mix of humans and anthropomorphic animals. As of 2020, Gary Larson decided to pick his pencil back up again and has started The Far Side up, circulating the comics on his official website.

Writer: Gary Larson

Colorist: Gary Larson

Nine’s Wide World of Sports

'Massive win' for rugby fans as 2024 Australia fixture list revealed

Wallabies fans will be treated to two home games against the world champion Springboks after Rugby Australia confirmed its fixture list for 2024.

Australia will host South Africa in back to back Rugby Championship Tests in Brisbane on August 10 and Perth on August 17.

But new coach Joe Schmidt's first assignment will be consecutive Tests against Wales in Sydney on July 6 and Melbourne on July 13.

Watch the 2024 Super Rugby Pacific season on the home of rugby, Stan Sport, kicking off on February 23. Every match ad free, live and on demand in 4K UHD

New Wallabies coach Joe Schmidt at Allianz Stadium.  Getty

The Wallaroos will play Fiji at Allianz Stadium before the first Wales Test.

Wales - coached by fellow Kiwi and Schmidt's long time Six Nations sparring partner Warren Gatland - humiliated the Eddie Jones coached Wallabies 40-6 at last year's Rugby World Cup.

"I'm also realistic, I know how competitive the top of the Test match tree is," Schmidt told Wide World of Sports radio.

"You get Wales first up, who put 40 points on the Wallabies. Well, what a fantastic turnaround challenge that is."

"The Wallabies will be looking for a reset this year, with Joe Schmidt to lead them against four high quality Test opponents on home soil, including Georgia who we look forward to welcoming to Australia for the first time," RA chief executive Phil Waugh said.

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Ireland coach Joe Schmidt and Wales coach Warren Gatland in 2018.  Getty

"To be able to host a double header in Sydney with both teams at Allianz Stadium will be a highlight on the Australian sporting calendar in 2024, while having the world champion Springboks play two Tests here is a massive win for all rugby supporters and sports fans in Australia."

The Wallabies will host the first Bledisloe Cup Test against the All Blacks in Sydney on September 20 before the return match in Wellington on September 28.

The Wallaroos will play a record four home Tests in 2024 including a date with world champions New Zealand in Brisbane on July 14.

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"We're continuing to honour our commitment to grow the women's game," Waugh said.

Wallabies 2024 home Tests

Wallabies v Wales, Saturday July 6 at Allianz Stadium, Sydney

Wallabies v Wales, Saturday July 13 at AAMI Park, Melbourne

Wallabies v Georgia, Saturday July 20 at Allianz Stadium, Sydney

The Rugby Championship/Bledisloe Cup

Wallabies v South Africa, Saturday August 10 at Suncorp Stadium, Brisbane

Wallabies v South Africa, Saturday August 17 at Optus Stadium, Perth

Wallabies v New Zealand, Saturday September 21 at Accor Stadium, Sydney

Wallaroos 2024 home fixtures

Wallaroos v Canada, Saturday May 11 at Allianz Stadium, Sydney

Wallaroos v USA, Friday May 17 at AAMI Park, Melbourne

Wallaroos v Fiji, Saturday July 6 at Allianz Stadium, Sydney

Wallaroos v New Zealand, Sunday July 14, Ballymore, Brisbane

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NEWS... BUT NOT AS YOU KNOW IT

One of BBC’s most groundbreaking TV shows first launched 40 years ago today

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In 1984 a new BBC TV show titled Crimewatch UK put the call out to the public asking for help to solve crimes .

Based on German TV show Aktenzeichen XY… ungelöst (which translates as File Reference XY … Unsolved), the series reconstructed major unsolved crimes hoping that it would encourage everyday people to assist police.  

Originally due to run for only three programmes , the first episode aired on June 7 and was hosted by Nick Ross and Sue Cook.

Considered as an experiment when it initially aired, there were doubts the police would take part and that witnesses and victims would welcome the idea.

There were also concerns that the show could be at risk of prejudicing juries.

However, the series was a hit and went on to run for 332 episodes over the subsequent 33 years.  

In each episode, three or four cases were presented, with each featuring reconstructions of the crime, interviews with senior detectives and/or relatives or friends of victims and key evidence including profiles of suspects and details of certain lines of enquiry.

A ‘CCTV section’ also showed crimes caught on camera, while ‘Wanted Faces’ showed close-up pictures of suspects police were searching for.

Viewers could contact Crimewatch by phoning 0500 600 600, with the phone lines remaining open until midnight the night following the programme.

For the first 11 years of the programme, it was fronted by Ross and Cook until she departed in June 1995 and was then replaced by Jill Dando.

However following Dando’s shocking murder in April 1999 (which itself is still unsolved) Ross went on to host solo until the following year, when Fiona Bruce joined.

After seven years on screen together Ross and Bruce left the show and were replaced by Kirsty Young and Matthew Amroliwala.

After their eventual exits in 2015 the BBC announced the show would relaunch with a new weekly format fronted by Jeremy Vine and Tina Daheley, who began their roles in September 2016.

However, a year later, in October 2017, the series was cancelled.

It ran for another five months before being taken off screens due to declining viewership.

At its peak, Crimewatch drew 14 million followers, but by 2017 it had fallen to an average of three million per episode.

By the time the last episode of Crimewatch aired on March 20, 2017, 57 murderers, 53 rapists and sex offenders and 18 paedophiles were captured as a direct result of Crimewatch appeals.

These included some of Britain’s most notorious crimes, including the kidnap of Stephanie Slater and murder of Julie Dart, the M25 rapist, the road-rage killing by Kenneth Noye, and the capture of two boys for the abduction and murder of James Bulger.

Despite its undeniable success in solving crimes, a study by the Broadcasting Standards Council found that Crimewatch increased the fear of crime in over half of its respondents, and a third said it made them feel ‘afraid’.

However, many others said its role in society was an overwhelmingly positive one, promoting collective responsibility and a sense of community.

As Ross said when he signed off each episode to address concerns about the effect the at-times confronting content could have on audiences: ‘Don’t have nightmares, do sleep well.’

Despite Crimewatch ending in 2017, its spin-off Crimewatch Live continues to air and catch criminals to this day.

A version of Crimewatch Live first aired from 2000 to 2001 as Crimewatch Daily, before a similar format returned in 2009, then named Crimewatch Roadshow and later became Crimewatch Live in 2021, currently hosted by Rav Wilding and Michelle Ackerley.

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The former is a retired policeman who last year said he was a ‘proud advocate of highlighting the work of our emergency services and the lengths they go to, to keep our communities safe’.

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